The lead-up to 4th year.

Wednesday, 5 September 2012

The last couple of weeks have felt a little weird.  In between a few fun outings with friends - like a trip to an amusement park the other day that we enjoyed with as much childish glee as actual children - I feel like I've had a black cloud looming over my head.  

My cooking has been pretty bad by my standards of late, partly due to a loss of appetite.  I don't know if my skills have just been sub-par lately or if it's just that I'm off my food, but the past couple of meals I've cooked just didn't taste nice, like this pear and Stilton tart.  Delicious when I've had it in the past, but I somehow managed to do something to make it gross.

Looks like a tart, tastes like salty feet.

I've also been incredibly accident prone.  Today alone, I managed to stub my toe while simultaneously smacking my elbow on the same corner I hit my toe on (resulting in all of my arm aching and an awful looking bruise) and scald myself with hot water.

Lady luck just hasn't been smiling on me.  My boyfriend, on the other hand, seems to have found himself a job and may well be moving soon.  This is fantastic for him - he only officially graduated in July, so getting a job that he likes the sound of that's also willing to give him accommodation is great - but it also serves as a reminder to me that I'm still stuck in an education that I no longer want any part of.  Save for a select few people, everyone in my life has now graduated and is moving on, but I'm still a student.

I'm looking forward to moving back to Manchester in about a week and a half, but I'm not really looking forward to classes.  Having an epiphany while on your year abroad that you don't want to do the language you're studying any more doesn't really bode well when you still have a year to go and literally no options as far as changing goes, meaning I'm stuck doing a subject that I really, really don't like any more.  It's kind of putting a damper on things, to say the least, and - silly me - looking around at all the jobs I want that I could be applying for if only I had graduated this year only made me feel worse.

To keep my spirits up, I've resolved to put as much effort as I can into volunteer work, both to keep myself happy and busy and to flesh out my currently rather sad looking CV.  Thankfully, there seems to be a lot of great opportunities for this in Manchester, and I'm excited to get started.  My mum isn't wonderfully happy about my choice to pour most of my energy into this over my classes, but I've resigned myself to doing what I can to get by in Japanese rather than pushing myself to the brink of insanity.  There's only so much of doing something that I don't want to be doing that I can take and, really, looking at a text book for a few minutes now is enough to seriously frustrate me.  Even if I get a crappy degree at the end of it, oh well, at least I'm done and I can finally move on with my life.

On another note, here's the first photo I've ever taken of the moon!  We had a full moon recently, and I decided to get out and try my hand at photographing it.  Not nearly as bad as it could've been.

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